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Section 6.2.3

Unnecessary Repetition

Avoid unnecessary repetition. One of the most common types of unnecessaryrepetition involves modifiers that repeatinformation given in the word modified.


small in size

completely eliminate

silver in color

maximize as much as possible

Unacceptable

Currently, aircraft must be kept a minimum of atleast three miles apart in the horizontal plane.

Improved

Currently, aircraft must be kept a minimum of threemiles apart in the horizontal plane.

--Jason C. Bunn, "Advanced Air Traffic Situation Control System"(modified)

Weak

In 1928, Alexander Fleming discovered for the firsttime that Penicillum mold could kill Staphylococcus bacteria in petridishes. Fleming named the lethalantibacterial chemical secreted by the deadly Penicillum mold,dubbing it "penicillin."

Improved

In 1928, Alexander Fleming discovered that Penicillum mold could killStaphylococcus bacteria in petri dishes. He dubbed the lethal antibacterialchemical secreted by the mold "penicillin."

--Laurie Garrett, The Coming Plague (modified)

Weak

Ability to separate from water is an essential prerequisite for ahydraulic oil to be used in plant systems where contamination of the hydraulicsystem by water is likely to form sludge emulsions of oil and water. [There is much repetition of phrases and terms in this sentence.]

Improved

Plants with hydraulic systems routinely exposed to water should usehydraulic oils that are immiscible with water.


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## Unnecessary Repetition ##
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